Holy Chutzpah—A High Holiday Reflection

Prefer to listen? Listen to the audio version.

A few years ago, I sat in synagogue during the Shema (Jewish prayer service). Shir Meira Feit was leading the service and began singing a beautiful melody they had put to the words of Rabbi Rami Shapiro. Called We Are Loved, the song invites us to notice that we are loved by an unending love AND that we are the unending love. It starts by inviting us to notice that we are embraced by arms that find us and ends with ours are the arms, the fingers, the voices. 

We are loved by an unending love.

This year, as I co-lead the Selichot* Prayer in the new community we have joined since our move, I was reminded of a song from my childhood that we would hear during the High Holidays. 

Someone would sing the song from Rabbi Levi Yitzchok of Bardichev (1740–1809). The melody is in Yiddish, and I will try to translate it. (You can listen to the Yiddish version here and read the lyrics here.)

And although some of the lyrics are inconsistent with my beliefs of God today, the gist and meaning of the song has stayed with me all these years. 

Rabbi Levi Yitzchok would begin this special time of year, with these words in a sing-song way:

“Master of the Universe, let us make a trade, a trade we will make.

What kind of trade, you ask me.

I will give you chatoim, avonim and peshaim (three kinds of “sins”—missing the mark, iniquity or moral failing and trespass or rebellion).

You will ask what you will give me in exchange, I will tell you.

You will give me mechila slicha, and kapara (three kinds of forgiveness—temporary reprieve from punishment, eraser like a pardon, and atoning a total removal of its negative effects).”

Then the Rabbi would continue,

“So you think that it will be an equal trade—no I tell you. You will also add, banai, chaya, umzonay (children, life, and prosperity).”

He would continue singing to God and then would end with Chatzi Kaddish (the prayer that exalts God’s name).

As I stood in front of my new community, the song came to me . . . I was reminded that in some communities we pray and pray and pray for a better year, an easier year, a year that would bring some relief to the terrible we are experiencing now, and we beg for forgiveness for all the ways we fell short, for the ways we missed the mark, for the ways we stumbled.

What if we allowed ourselves to add the chutzpah (audacity) of Rabbi Levi Yitzchok where we are asking for more, and more, for a year beyond our wildest imagination, one that will surpass the narrowness and pain we feel, one that once we ask forgiveness from others, we can forgive ourselves, one where we give our mistakes to the Divine and receive reprieve.

We forget that as a people, we are allowed to ask for more, imagine bigger, step into magic and chutzpah. 

Rabbi Levi Yizchok didn’t get up there on Yom Kippur to ask God to forgive and proclaim they will do better. No, he demanded a better life for the people, he traded, he asked for more than an equal trade. He says to the Creator of the Universe—you think it will be an equitable trade—NO! You will give us more . . . bigger and greater.

As we stand on the threshold of this New Year, may we notice all the ways the year has been hard for individuals, groups, and as a collective. May we notice all of the ways that we are divided. May we notice all of the ways that we dehumanize one another and the toll it takes on each and every one of us to see our fellow humans as less than worthy of life and compassion. 

If you had the Bardisheve Rebbe’s chutzpah—what would you imagine?

What would you dream into?

What would you ask for? 

And if we are the hands, feet, and voice of God, how would you step into creating a world that has not been born yet? 

How would you show up bigger, better, and bolder to do the work of the Divine and co-create a world that holds all of us, one that is beyond anything any of us has ever imagined?

Shana Tova (Happy New Year)
A git gebetchta yar (A Blessed Year)

Blessings,
Chani

*Selichot Prayer is the prayer that starts the High Holiday services about a week or so before Rosh Hashanah (the Jewish New Year).